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Showing posts with label rape kit. Show all posts
Showing posts with label rape kit. Show all posts

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

Let the Anger Cause Change!



A 15-year-old student who was gang-raped as bystanders did nothing delivered a message of peace to a rally at her high school last night. "Violence is always the wrong choice," the girl said in a message read by her pastor. "We realize people are angry about this. But let the anger cause change, change that is necessary to keep our children, our neighbors, and our friends safe."

Six people are currently in custody for the two-hour attack that left the victim in critical condition as bystanders watched and took pictures with cell phones. Police are seeking more suspects, the San Francisco Chronicle reports. A close friend of the victim said she may return to school, where she was attacked last month as she left her homecoming dance. "As long as no one treats her differently from before, she'll be fine," the pal said. "She's still the same person, just less trusting now."
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I m so appalled at that pal's "well meaning" words. I applaud the survivor to prevail upon non violence and to use this experience to evoke change. Equally stunning is the support that the other students and the community is giving this victim and recognizing that this is an outrageous crime. I doubt though America would have taken much notice except for the fact that the teens who "watched" or filmed with camera phones did not stop it nor call for help.

Unless one is actually in the position of the survivor, I do not think they can imagine that life will ever be the same for her or even the apathetic losers who watched this. Surely the guilt must eat at them. How could they have not cared to get involved?

The child was in intensive care, had a rape kit done which involves hours of scraping swapping and collecting evidence. It is not like the movies or tv, over in five minutes. You are poked and prodded by strangers, photographed naked, tweezered and swabbed while one struggles to keep trembling thighs apart while a doctor or tech inserts a speculum into an already painful area that has been traumatized.

then come the grillings from the police, why were you there? what did you do? what did they do? To say I was raped is not good enough for pressing charges, one has to spell it out and relive it in detail again. later another detective might question you again to make sure you arent lying ( as if one would under go all that just for fun. If there is a court case, one goes before a grand jury or straight to trial unless you chicken out and wont testify... which is quite normal considering all the wounding that has been done already. And if by chance he goes free, you will
still be fine" Please.

Tuesday, July 14, 2009

Another wall of Shame Award

Imagine you have just been assaulted physically and sexually. You call the police who come and ask you lots of questions and tell you to go to the hospital and get a rape kit done. You are poked, prodded and scraped by strangers who are trying to care for you but are still strangers. You are again questioned and finally released to try to piece your life together.
First stop, a shower for hours, trying to scrub the stench off of you. Family and friends don't know how to deal with you. They innocently ask why did you go there?or why didn't fight back? or why did you trust him? They do not know the harm this secondary wounding does. Maybe you seek professional help, maybe you live in denial and fear for months.
One sunny day, you open your mail to discover a bill for your rape kit and hospital exams even though you are told that the state pays for it. All those images close back in on you, bleak, black, desolate fear. Now you have to fight the authorities and hospital for compensation, reopening old wounds, still feeling as a victim, persecuted for the crime of just being the closest female to the perp at the time he decides to take control. All the while trying to hold it together for your family. You are in such a deep depression, that this could send a fragile one over the edge. Or make others not want to come forward, allowing perps to continue to violate women.

This is not a joke. It did and does happen in Houston... as seen in this article
http://www.click2houston.com/news/19400415/detail.html

Makes one think... who is on the victim's side? This is why some cities have advocates who help through the process, but they are few and far between. If you want to help others, this is an area that desparately needs assistance.

What if it were your mom or your daughter?